Wednesday 11 August 2010

The I'll do anything Brigade! Commentary on the trials and tribulations of being a dominatrix!

Being a dominatrix isn't just all about whipping bottoms until they are red and barking orders at pathetic snivelling wimps...ok well it is mostly but there are a lot of other aspects to it as well. Especially if one is a lifestyle dominatrix as well as a pro. So what's a lifestyle dominatrix I hear you ask? Well quite simply a Mistress/dominatrix who indulges in the wonderful arts of femdom for amusement, personal gain as opposed to profit.
Simply, that means occasionally when my busy schedule permits I'll allow a slave (who has proven themselves to me (either by paid appointment previously or via webcam) to come and clean my house and tend to the duties I don't have time for. If I am not too rushed off my feet, I'll tend to tease them now and again, give them a crop on the bottom or verbally berrate them for a lack of attention/because I feel like it.

It all sounds so nice and easy doesn't it? Getting your housework done for free and having a good old giggle at the mortal fool for his efforts! Of course there is the amount of time it can take to find good slaves who are hard working, eager to please, don't steal your panties and aren't thoroughly annoying. It's not easy when you are this fussy!

I usually decide within the first couple of e-mails whether a slave is suitable or not. One thing that tends to put me off are e-mails which does not list any specific skills, and a general apparent lack of thought!
With an excess of needy, hopefully applicants, I look for those who are local, flexible and have something unique to offer. Yet despite trying to hammer this point home there are only a few that bother to suggest their unique selling points!
How I tired of the bland and unimaginiative responses to my question "Do you have any unique talents/skills/strengths?" which tend to follow the banal path of "I'll do anything to please you Mistress!" But it does not actually answer the question does it?! There are no listed attributes or skills so no sub stands out from another amongst a pile of these typical responses. I can imagine the poor bugger wading through X factor audition letters feeling the same kind of internal agony at this needelss repitition and bleating!

My favourite response to said subs who make little effort to impress would be:

"Will you REALLY do anything? Would you run into a police station wearing nothing but fishnets stockings and a pair of marigolds, yelling 'screw the pigs'! Would you have your penis surgically removed and attached to your forehead so that it flaps around in the breeze? If YES then you are an imbecile and a liability! If NO then you are a liar and WON'T do [i]anything[/i] to please me!"

Ahhh fortunately I have a couple of reliable subs now, one of which dresses up in a rubber maids costume before tending to my washing up, sweeping and admin duties.

And for now I'll just keep looking for subs with unique selling points whilst brandishing my polished whip and lashing my twisted tongue!

Good day to all fellow dominatrixes, subs and slaves out there and have a wonderfully kinky day!

Kaz (aka Princess Kaz)